Super Happy Fun Time

While watching the Euro Cup final yesterday (Italy got SPANKED) our signal went out for an agonizing eternity due to some storms in the North East, which must be where the signal feed was coming in from. I don’t understand how cable works, but it doesn’t work well in a storm. Turns out that DC was also getting spanked by God. We did not get a storm down here. We are still at 100 degrees and holding like champions. The past few days have been spent lying under the ac vent, limbs akimbo, with all the lights off and wondering if this throbbing sensation in my skull is indicative of my brains boiling.

Last Friday was ridiculous. I’d spent most of the day inside, watching the world beyond the windows evaporate & upon leaving for the day, hit a wall of solid heat. After crawling to the car and recovering from the pain of having my flesh melt into the car seat, I turned the car on and let it sputter. The car doesn’t do well in the heat. It stalls and decides to conserve energy by diverting energy from the a/c and focusing it on heat-producing activities like…whatever else cars do besides have functioning a/c systems. It works just fine when it’s warm out. But when it truly gets hot, the a/c system autocratically decides that you’re going to die of heat exhaustion in this kind of weather anyway, it’s not going to try to prolong your agony by temporarily cooling you down a little.

While hating heat and the a/c system and life in general on the way home at two miles an hour in ridiculous traffic on the most useless, poorly planned road in all creation, I received a telephone call.

“There’s a 10k on Wednesday, want to run? Doesn’t that sound like fun?” Unbelievably, there was genuine enthusiasm baked into this request.

“…yes…would be the answer that you’re fishing for here…?” I’d just finished talking about my reduced capacity to function in this weather, so the creative segue into this request kind of blew me away and caught me off-guard. He explained that this was supposed to be the best 10k in the country. While he wasn’t able to quantify or qualify “best”, he did successfully make the 10k sound necessary. It still doesn’t sound like fun, though. (I should also add that it was around this point in our conversation that my car stalled. This did not dissuade me from the idea of road-tripping in the dream-machine, but if it tries any of that monkey-business hundreds of miles from home, there’s a sledgehammer in the back of the car unearthed by detailers yesterday and -if left to die on the side of the highway- that car will be systematically demolished into sub-atomic particles).

I blew my knee out recently when a spatially challenged, over-enthusiastic (brown) missile (dog) slammed into it while I was just standing there, in a rather large, open area with lots of other directions to have decided to direct idiocy-at-speed. I didn’t pass out, but definitely thought about it and saw dancing globules of pain-stars for several minutes before recovering awareness of my immediate surroundings. So there’s problem number one. Going up stairs still brings a wee tear to me eye.

Also, I haven’t yet found the perfect pair of running shoes for my mutant feet. I did return the pretty pink ones and buy the nasty alien green ones with arch-supports and the vents that I can see my socks through. They’re a complete fail in the fashion department and if it were possible to run with bags affixed on top of them, I would. They pinch the back of my heel and don’t fit my left foot properly. I ran for a miracle mile yesterday before the fumes from the melting asphalt and pain from bloody ankles overtook me.

“What’s the weather supposed to be like?” I’d asked on this same call last Friday.

“Only 96, it’s practically a cold front.” And girly giggling.

So, yeah. This should be fun. Yay, best 10k ever! Super happy fun time!


4 thoughts on “Super Happy Fun Time

  1. Mike says:

    I learned of another reason to love sandals recently when I found out my left foot is about a full size bigger than my right. Irritating!

  2. Anonymous says:

    Love hearing from both my “normal” grandkids!

  3. Anonymous says:

    Abbi-normal runs in the family… just sayin’

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